Summary:

Ashely realizes that it's the end of the road for her and John's relationship.  She has to go on her own way and leave him behind.  But what does he have to say about it?

Gotta Go My Own Way                                                                                                 By CraftyTink529

Their car ride had been quiet and their walk even quieter. On a night when John Cena had planned on telling her how much he needed her to be with him all the time, his girlfriend, Ashley Craft had decided she had enough with their two way too busy schedules.

 

“John, I gotta say what's on my mind. I’ve been really thinking and something about us just doesn't seem right these days. Life keeps getting in the way, you’re busy, I’m busy and whenever we try, somehow the plan for us to do something, to actually spend time together as a couple is always rearranged.” Ashley sighed as they came to a stop on a bridge over looking the water in downtown Tampa.

 

“I know Ash, believe me, I don’t like it either. But I don’t get it, I think everything is fine. I know it sucks, but we knew what we both signed on for when we started this relationship. I told you from the get go I’d be gone 300 days a year practically. I’ve been home the last 90 and I’ve barely seen you. You’ve been in court the whole time.” John said.

 

He and Ashley met at a Rays game three years ago and were inseparable since. Well, at least when they were home with each other. Ashley was a criminal prosecution attorney for the state and John, being the famous guy that he is, was never home.

 

Ashley sighed loudly. “That what makes this so hard to say, John.” She took in a shaky breath, hoping he wouldn’t catch on to her emotions. “But I've gotta do what's best for me. You'll be ok, John. You’ll adjust. And I will too eventually.”

 

“Ashley, what are you saying?” John asked, he too now scared at what might happen.

 

“I've got to move on and be who I am. I just don't belong here, I hope you understand.

 

We might find our place in this world someday. We might be together again down the road. But, at least for now, I gotta go my own way. I can’t sit here and wait for you to come home whenever Vince feels like letting you.” Ashley said looking over the water and away from him.

 

“Ashley, don’t do this. Please.” John Cena had never really known heartache until that moment.

 

“I don't want to leave it all behind. I really don’t. But I get my hopes up, thinking you’re coming home like scheduled and planned, but something comes up and I watch them fall every time. Another color turns to grey, and it's just too hard to watch it all slowly fade away. I'm leaving today. I’ve got to do this. I’ll stay at my mom’s until Friday when you fly back home to Boston for Survivor Series and then I’ll come pack up my things.” Ashley said to him still not looking at him.

 

“Why are you doing this to us Ashley? Damn it, just look at me.” John demanded taking her hand in his to get her attention.

 

“Because I’ve already told you, John, I've got to do what's best for me. You'll be ok. You’ll move on. I've got to move on and be who I am, who’ve I’ve set out to be. I just don't belong here, I never have. I hope you understand that. I know you will eventually. If we’re meant to be, then we’ll find out down the road and we’ll be together again. But for now, I have to go.” Ashley said, finally looking into his red, watery blue eyes. Blue eyes that always matched hers. Even on a day like today, they were both red and watery blue eyes.

 

“What about us? What about everything we've been through?” John asked.

 

They had been through a lot. His mistake with his ex, early on in their relationship, her miscarriage, the hopes and dreams they were trying to build together.

 

“What about trust?” Ashley’s voice cracked as she spoke. She was almost completely broken, but she tried to hold strong so he didn’t really know how much this actually hurt her to do and say.

 

“That was a long time ago, Ashley. It was a mistake. I thought we were over that. You know I never wanted to hurt you.” John held her hands in his.

 

“And what about me? I can’t keep waiting for our timing to be right, John, we’re just too busy.” Ashley said in a shaky tone.

 

“What am I supposed to do with out you?” John asked.

 

That did it, those words broke Ashley. “I gotta leave but I'll miss you.” She said letting a tear roll down her cheek.

 

John wiped it away with the pad of his thumb, blinking away his own tears. “I'll miss you.”

 

“I've got to. That’s my cab.” Ashley said seeing the headlights pull up. She had called the cab company while she was in the restroom at dinner.

 

“Why do you have to go now?” John asked. “Let me take you to your mom’s. Maybe we can talk about this some more.”

 

“We don’t belong together anymore, John, not right now.” Ashley said. “I really hope you understand.”

 

“I'm trying to understand, baby, I really am.” John now let his one tear fall as he walked swiftly behind her.

 

“If it’s meant to be John, it’ll all work out. I’m a firm believer in that and I know you are too.” Ashley said turning to face him, her face now shimmering from the tear stains on her rosy cheeks.

 

“I want you to stay. Please stay.” John begged grabbing her hand just as she was about to get into the cab.

 

She was silent for a moment, contemplating for the millionth time that day if she really was doing the right thing. “I want to go. I have to.”

 

John closed his eyes, holding back more tears. Ashley took this opportunity to give him one final kiss. She grabbed his face with her hands and pulled him to her level, kissing him with all the passion in the world, all the love in the world.

 

“I’ll always love you John.” Ashley said, pulling away and getting into the cab.

 

John just stood there, eyes burning with tears, heart aching and stomach turning. He felt so sick. But he started to understand why she was going. He knew he needed to work harder and achieving his goals and let their paths cross naturally. He would wait for her. She just had to go her own way.